


Dolts, Dines and Disasters

by A_Guy_Called_2623



Category: RWBY
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-27
Updated: 2020-03-27
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:07:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23342194
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/A_Guy_Called_2623/pseuds/A_Guy_Called_2623
Summary: I was given a prompt to make a fluff story and this is the result of said prompt. I might have gotten a little out of control, and it certainly went a lot longer than I'd thought it could, but clearly, things happened. This is my first true "ship fic", wherein a relationship is front and center, the driving force of the plotline.
Relationships: Ruby Rose/Weiss Schnee
Kudos: 41





	Dolts, Dines and Disasters

**Author's Note:**

> Author’s Notes:
> 
> Something a little bit different from me here, a full-fledged fluff fic. This will likely stay a one-shot, but who knows. Anythingtodistractmyselffrom“PluckedRose”,Imeanwhat. This was also mainly written with Grammarly, as an experiment (#notsponsored). Anyway, on with the fluff.

“Weiss!” a voice roared. “Hurry it up in there! I only allowed you this day once, if you take another minute I’ll tell her it’s off!”

Weiss just rolled her eyes. “You know full well if you do that, she’ll never let you hear the end of it.” Her voice turned teasing. “I’m still surprised she managed to talk you into it. I thought you were Yang Xiao-Long, steadfast and impossible to turn.”

“Oh ha ha ha princess,” Yang mockingly replied. “Just because you can tell jokes doesn’t mean you get my blessing. Now seriously hurry up, you’re gonna be late.”

“I have never once been late for anything,” Weiss huffily retorted as the door opened. “Especially not where Ruby is concerned.”

“Speaking of,” a reply started. “Should _I_ be concerned about what your plans with my little sister are?”

“Not at all in the slightest,” came the response. “But I’ll let you draw your own conclusions for yourself. How do I look?”

A small smile came to Yang’s face as she looked over the heiress. “Well, first of all, I did not think anyone, let alone you could wear blue so well. Add the blush from when she says literally anything and you’ll be downright perfect.”

Weiss almost retorted, but after stealing a glance at the blonde brawler’s eyes, she decided to keep it to herself. A knock on the dorm door came.

“Yang?” Blake’s voice called in. “Is she decent? I’ve had a lot of trouble here with your sister.”

“She’s more than decent Blake,” Yang smirked. “I’d actually say you have a bit of competition in the looks depart-”

A thrown pillow quickly brought Yang’s verbal machinations to a stop, as the door began to open. Weiss’s breath caught as she saw her partner. Of course, she was wearing mostly red, but the little accents of white at the ends of her sleeves brought it entirely together. A sharp elbow to the side brought Weiss back to the dorm as Yang slid away, grinning like an idiot.

Ruby shuffled her feet a little bit before looking towards the heiress, whose face had gone as red as her partner’s dress. Ruby wasn’t really all that much better, realistically speaking, but Weiss looked as though she’d pass out from a fever.

At last, Weiss managed to wrap her head around the sight and stammered out “You look really beautiful.”

Ruby went a quite becoming shade of red at the compliment and meekly responded, “You do as well, you know.”

The two just stared at each other, seemingly locked in a competition to see who could go the reddest. Wordlessly, Yang and Blake left the pair to themselves, but not before the blonde shot the pair with a set of finger guns, grinning the whole time. After they’d left the room, the bee pair exchanged a few quick words.

“Are you sure they’ll let us in?” Blake asked.

“Blakey,” Yang practically scoffed. “I already called, they’re completely fine with us as long as we don’t make a scene.”

“What about your sister?” Blake cut in. “You think she’s fine with being spied on? Especially on a private day like this?”

“I gotta look out for her you know? I promised Dad I’d always do that. She’s too much like Mom and he just wants his little girl safe.”

“While that’s very honorable Yang, she has grown a lot in the year I’ve known her. I think one little night on her own isn’t gonna be too bad.”

Yang cast Blake a sideways smirk. “You have a good point, but I’m choosing not to listen.” With that, she yanked her partner down the hallway and towards the door.

* * *

At the restaurant, however, another pair was already in position for their own plan.

“Are you sure about this, Nora?” Jaune asked for the umpteenth time. “And why’d you drag me along? Even in this suit, I stand out like a sore thumb.”

“Quit whining so much,” the redhead grimaced. “I told you, there’s nothing to worry about. The staff is fine with us doing this, and as long as we don’t make ourselves obvious, they won’t notice either.”

“Yeah but this feels like a massive betrayal of trust,” responded the knight. “How would you feel if they spied on you and Ren?”

Nora just “pshaw”-ed the notion away and dragged her team leader off to the dining area.

* * *

It took nearly an hour for Ruby and Weiss to arrive at the diner, appropriately called “The Ice Flower”. Most of the time had been spent between the pair trying and failing to out-compliment each other. Oddly, Ruby hadn’t sped ahead like she normally would have, instead opting to stay right by Weiss’ side during the travel. As far as the two were concerned, nothing could go wrong, and most importantly, they were completely alone. They would be free to spend the day doing whatever came to mind, even very naughty things like snuggling or, Brother Gods forbid, hand-holding.

They came up to the door, and Ruby dashed over to open it for the other girl, performing a small curtsey as Weiss just smiled more sunnily than the star itself. _“It’s all coming together at last,”_ Ruby’s inner mind vocalized, before being rather embarrassingly silenced by her stomach. It took most of Weiss’s willpower not to laugh at the expression that flashed across her partner’s face.

* * *

As the pair entered the establishment, Yang and Jaune, both unaware of the other’s presence, made a beeline for the pair. Cover stories at the ready, their respective plans were well and truly in motion. At least until they slammed into each other about three tables away from the arrivals. Needless to say, the two were quite surprised to see the other, but not a word was said. That news would go to their partners on the return. Yang got to her feet and went to greet the two huntresses-in-training, while Jaune quickly turned around to receive an order from a nearby table.

“Hello ladies,” as Yang put on her best attempt at an Atleasan accent. “The name is Barbara Dunks, you could call me Bimmy. Where may I be seating you today?”

Weiss saw right through the phony accent and replica outfit but decided to play along, for Ruby’s sake. “Yes, we have a reservation for Table 12.”

“And might I say that is an excellent choice, Ms…?”

“Schnee,” the heiress responded, almost daring Yang to break character. “This is my partner, Ms. Rose.”

The subtlest of smirks crossed Yang’s face. “Alright, you two, just follow me and I’ll direct you to your table.”

“Excellent,” Weiss curtly replied.

As the blonde led the pair off towards the table, she noticed an older, rather lanky man practically stumble through the front entrance out of the corner of her eye. _“Oh no, Uncle Qrow,”_ her mind whispered. _“I thought Clover was supposed to be with him? Why’s he here alone? Why’s he even here, at all?”_ Luckily Qrow hadn’t seen the pair yet, and they hadn’t seen him either. All said, she still hurried them towards the table they’d reserved.

“Whenever you two are ready to order, just ring up the kitchen, and we’ll get someone out to receive you before even a second passes.”

“Thank you,” Weiss quickly replied. She turned towards Ruby, who already had her head buried in the menu. The younger whistled in surprise. 

“By Ozma, this place is expensive. Even the simplest appetizer’s 20 lien. And the meals… sheesh, 45 for a burger? Is there some sort of huntress discount, because I don’t think even you could afford this, Weiss.” In response to her musings, Ruby received a swift, forceful elbow in the side.

“Ignore my partner,” Weiss quickly stated. “For she knows not what she says.”

Yang almost broke her character at that moment, along with Weiss’s jaw, but before disaster could strike, she subsided. “Actually there is a 5% discount for Active-Duty Hunters at this establishment, Ms. Rose. It’s our way of giving back to you for your services.”

The ex-heiress’s eyes went wide in surprise. “In that case, I apologize, Ruby, for _I_ know not what I say.”

Ruby responded with a little chuckle and an elbow of her own into Weiss’ side. “And you call _me_ the dolt.”

"Only because you do dolty things all the time," Weiss replied with the smallest hint of the _Ice Queen_ creeping up.

 _Now for the killing blow_ , a traitorous part of Ruby's mind considered with a Yang-like smirk plastered on her face. "You know you love it, otherwise you wouldn't be blushing like that."

No reply came from Weiss, not only because her cheeks had gone redder than her partner’s cloak, but also because Ruby was right in a sense. Of course, the great Weiss Schnee would never verbally admit this, but the look she gave Ruby was more than enough.

* * *

But as the night went on, things began to happen. Once, as Ruby stole a glance to her partner, a waiter, who looked and sounded suspiciously like Jaune, tripped into the next table over.

“ **OHO! OW!** Head Knee combo too. Oooh…”

A waitress on the shorter side, with bright orange hair, sped over to her fallen fellow. “Miles, are you alright?”

Miles tried to stand on his own, only for his bruised knee to give out. “What does it look like, Sam?”

Sam stared for a moment, before responding with a very simple “Right”, as she started moving not-Jaune.

Later in the evening, another rather unusual thing happened. Arryn, a Faunus who looked incredibly like Blake, came over to refill the pair’s drinks only to trip by the next table over. The very same table that had brought down Miles not half an hour before. And of course, the drinks found their way to the pair, just not in a very appreciable fashion as Ruby found her dress soaked, entirely to the seams.

“Weiss,” she tentatively began. “I know how much you like this place but this is the second incident in an hour. You think there might be something wrong?”

Weiss looked to her partner, with genuine concern and care building in her icy blue eyes. “If you aren’t comfortable, we could try another time, another place. And it would be completely ok, believe me.”

Ruby returned the look, a small smile appearing. “I’m ok if you’re ok, Weiss. I would say it’s your call.”

Weiss could only mirror the smile, but as they reached out to clasp the other’s hand, Barb appeared with another set of menus.

“And here are our dessert options, if you’d like to have a look and see,”

“Actually, Ms. Dunks,” Ruby spoke up. “We were just about to ask for the check.”

At that simple phrase, Yang’s mind fell to pieces. _Oh no, what’d we do? What happened? Why are they leaving early? Is it good or bad?_

Barbara cleared her throat and shattered mind, and plucked up a nervous response. “Leaving so soon? Was everything satisfactory?”

“The only way it could have been better is if my dearest sister Yang could have seen it.” Ruby sighed dramatically. “Alas, she had to go on a top-secret infiltration meeting with Blake, so word of mouth will just have to suffice.”

There was something only too smug about what she had said, but Yang couldn’t call her sister out on it. Not yet anyway, and probably not for a very long time. Maybe after Salem was put to rest.

“Well, I hope you did enjoy your time here,” Barbara replied. “If there was anything at all we could do better, just tell any of us upfront and we’ll service it before your next visit.”

The partners shared a glance, and the slightest smirk, before the former Heiress spoke up, but only as a whisper. “Try to make your disguise a little less obvious next time, we could both tell it was you from the first word you spoke. And be sure to tell Jaune, Nora, and Blake that too.”

Cover blown, Yang’s face fell straight to the floor. She watched the two giggle and laugh away, out of the diner and back towards the Academy Dorms.

“Saw the whole thing, Firecracker,” came a voice Yang had been almost dreading to hear. “Those Schnee’s are more perceptive than they let on. It’s how they dominate in business ventures.”

“But _Ruby_ figured it out too,” Yang replied, still dumbstruck. “Was I that obvious?”

“Maybe, maybe not,” came Qrow’s response. “All I do know is your friends put on quite a show of themselves.”

“Oh please, that was just you working your Semblance to make us look like chumps.”

“I would say ‘no’, but you know how it is.” He stood, and gave her a quick hug. “I’ll see you at the training arena tomorrow, old Jimmy has some tactics for that arm of yours.”

“Anything’s better than fooling around here with a trio of chumps,” Yang chortled as she followed him outside.

* * *

It came as no surprise to either Weiss or Ruby that they were, for all intents and purposes, home alone when they arrived at the dorms. They could see the sun setting behind some of Atlas’ tallest towers, casting great shadows, but also flooding the windows with beautiful red hues.

“This was nice,” Ruby conceded to Weiss for the second time since they’d returned. She zipped over to the door to open it but found a tiny knight already doing so. Turning, she saw Weiss smirk as a tiny glyph spun in her left hand.

The younger just laughed and strode in their dorm, before a grin started on her face. “You know, we’re gonna be alone for a while. Blake and Yang are probably finishing a shift, so that means they’ll be out another hour.”

Weiss’s lips curled. “What are you suggesting Ruby?”

“Oh I don’t know,” the younger continued, her grin growing ever wider. “Maybe we sit together on one of our beds and watch some movie, _together_?”

Weiss crossed her arms, a completely false frown forming. “Ruby Rose, are you suggesting that we, and forgive my Mistralian, _snuggle_?”

Feigned shock broke out across the Rose’s face, as her hand flew to her mouth. “Weiss! Did you kiss your mother with that mouth?”

Weiss started to mirror her partner’s original grin. Then came, the killing blow. “I plan to kiss my partner with it.”

Both girls were silent for a moment afterward, before Ruby started to laugh. It only took a moment before Weiss joined in. They laughed until neither could stand any longer and they both fell onto the Heiress’ bunk, wiping the happy tears from their eyes.

“Well Ruby, it looks like you managed to melt the Ice Queen,” Weiss sighed.

“There never was one,” Ruby simply replied, her silver eyes gleaming with joy. “You were always there, even when you thought you weren’t.”

Weiss just smiled. “I couldn’t have realized that without you. Thank you.”

“Thank **you** ,” came the plain reply. “Thank you for letting me in.”

The two of them clasped hands and slowly fell asleep, thinking of all the other had done, thinking of how much better they were as people because of their partners, and eventually drifting off to a happier place.

**Author's Note:**

> Author’s Note:
> 
> Man, I was not expecting this to go as long as it did. 2554 words, not including these notes. I hope you enjoyed this dive into a ship fic from me, feel free to leave your thoughts and suggestions for improvements in the replies/reviews, it does help a lot.
> 
> If anyone is wondering where the idea for this one-shot came from, I was given this prompt by a friend on Discord: “How about one where the two [Weiss and Ruby] go on a date but things go wrong in silly ways (Because Qrow is secretly spying on them and bad luck semblance Ex Machina)”. As you can see, it spiraled out of control into this beast of a story, and I don’t regret a thing.
> 
> A quick note, yes, I did use the names of the VA's for the cover names of JNBY. "Why," I hear you asking?, Purely because I could, and because it could easily add some extra humor.
> 
> While I’m here, I may as well explain some of my current status. I have a mini-fic written on the RWBY subreddit, that is ready to post, should the time/need come. I haven’t been able to put any work in on “Plucked Rose of Remnant” and I know you all probably want to see more, but here’s the thing. It just doesn’t feel right to continue any other way except with the plotline I left. However, I also just do not have the energy to put into such a project, so if it does happen, don’t expect it for a good few weeks/months.
> 
> With that, however, I must make like the Volume 2 opening, because its “Time To Say Goodbye”. I look forward to seeing if anything will be said, and until I next post: Happy Reading.


End file.
